Confessions of a Sales Assistant . . .

Hey USC (undercover sales clerk) what do you have for me today?

USC: Around 2pm, finished my 30min lunch break, this gentleman storms in the store camp as christmas oozing with attitude.

I said, 'Good afternoon Sir, how may I help you?'

Customer: 'Well I bought a jacket from you 10 days ago and it's faulty'

'Ok, what seems to be the problem?'

Customer: I can't fasten the zip.

USC: I'm like Ok, Can I see the jacket?
I had a look at it, it was clearly worn and had stains on it and sweat marks.
Had a look at the zip, the zip was functioning Ok.
I showed him how the zip worked.

He tried to zip it himself. Started sweating and effing at me; claiming the zip doesnt work on him, when it clearly did as I zipped it about 5 times.

Roving Reporter: hehehe, hilarious!

USC: I explained the zip needs to clip before you pull it up, another colleague of mine comes over with the same jacket from the shopfloor and we started doing zip traing to this gentleman.

Roving Reporter: Omg I would have died.

USC: He was clearly not impressed that we tried to explain in a nice way that he is so incompetent as towards how the zip fastens.

After my manager spoke to him, he stormed out of the store with the jacket he had, like Posh Spice when she came across the cast of Eastenders at that swanky restaurant.

Roving Reporter: Stop it, I can barely breathe!